Shining A Light TO Show Just What Invisible Illness Is…….

The last few weeks I’ve felt myself disappearing down that shute, you know that tunnel, where all invisible illness sufferers go when health dips……BUT unlike past falls, I don’t stop……I just rest!  I rest, so that I can continue my own healing and my advocacy for all invisible illness goddesses and warriors around the globe.

I’ve had to rest because on Monday June 26, I am launching an ongoing awareness campaign to shine the light on invisible Illness. I’ve been watching videos, documentaries, reading articles, writing articles and blogs all about showing, sharing and bringing the invisibility of chronic illness to reality for those that live with them but also for those that walk this world with ignorance and uneducated thoughts, actions and feelings about how I and many others live every single day.

My campaign is about shining a light on how difficult it is to live with debilitating chronic and invisible illnesses. This is why I walk and talk my daily journey- the good, the bad, the indifferent and just the plain weird! Everyday I want to share a different story, so that greater awareness can be brought to the world. From Monday I will share a series of blogs about a variety of different invisible illnesses, some that I live with……some that others live with and through these stories brought about by conversations, you will see these illnesses in a new and different light. 
I want the light that I am igniting to bring about new conversations between you and your loved ones, friends, colleagues and even strangers. Because you see, when we begin to converse, we can begin to connect better and therefore we can better help each other get through the tough times that these illnesses bring.

On Monday, as I begin to shine a bigger light on invisible illness, I will be beginning with my own story and my newest diagnosis of (FND) Functional Neurological Disorder. Today, as a taster, I am giving you a brief introduction; This disorder occurs as a result of a problem with my central nervous system and my brain failing to send or receive messages correctly. The list of symptoms is very long as you will get to learn and many of them are extremely disabling. Also a lot of the symptoms that I will talk about, are also found in the diagnosis of MS & Parkinson’s Disease making it high level debilitating, life changing and hard to diagnose. Living with FND, sees me experience many symptoms all at the same time. What is difficult with this disorder, is that I have to live with frequency and severity of symptoms with a list of other chronic illnesses as well. So, you see describing what it is and how it affects me is a long process, but it is a process that the world needs to hear and see and that is why I am lighting the flame for invisible Illness.

I would love to connect with you, if you or someone you know, also lives with an invisible illness. 

Please connect with me here or perhaps on one of my social media accounts and let’s light the flame for invisible illnesses;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/just_1_goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess

TBG πŸ’‹

Tired, Weary, Broken & Fucked Up……..

So what happens when we fall……and we all do!

You know, those moments when we are tired, weary, broken & fucked up!!!!


These thoughts, feelings and actions occur when we live with invisible illness. These are the moments that make us need to keep fighting the pain of being chronically and invisibly ill. Illnesses such as anxiety, depression, autoimmune and neurological disorders fill us with scars that embed deeply into our mental, emotional and physical being. 

Beginning the process of healing and recovery from these debilitating illnesses takes work BUT throughout the process and progress, low energy succumbs and we fall……! We tire and perhaps stumble from all the work that it takes to recover AND it affects us…..and if this happens, we fall and we break!!!! 

When this happens, we feel that we have fucked everything up……all that progress-RUINED!

But these emotions that come and go when wandering a journey with invisible illness are real and we should not be ashamed of letting the world see them! We haven’t fucked up….it’s a stumble and yeah, if we fall, it’s just that a fall…..stand back up – be present and be YOU! Remember even mentally and physically strong people fall! This conversation that I am having tonight is such a strong anti-suicide message, for why fighting is so important to remember when we are overwhelmed with the chronic pain and suffering of these illnesses.

You are saying. . . but at these moments I’m too tired to keep fighting……Yeah, I get it, I’ve felt really tired too and YES I still tire after all my 15 years fighting……but I won’t give up, I don’t give up!

Invisible illnesses are diseases that can take a life time to recover from. They grind away at our inner most core, sucking the life out of us, just as we are rebuilding ourselves up from the ground. The fight becomes a moment to moment battle everyday and as we go, we have to listen to the self whispering, but more than that we have to stand up to our voices and the external voices who don’t recognise our illnesses as illnesses……it’s exhausting, and it’s why we get tired, weary and feel broken and fucked up!

These illnesses, these invisible fucking illnesses never take holidays so every day and every night you have to fight, fight and fight again. You might be finding the biggest reasons in the world to give up, but those reasons don’t need to be your reality. In fighting these illnesses, no one can see or know how hard you’re working to keep going every day. The fight is hard and in the walk to recovery you will feel broken.

BUT, WE NEED TO FIGHT……I know, you are saying, you don’t want too,  sometimes I have said that too, but you don’t get to stop. I’m sorry, but the statistics say life is better than death and I insist you go on living……I am and I do!

But the good news is that when you choose to fight, you choose to take your next breath. Our invisible illnesses want to steal us of everything that we want to and need to experience today, tomorrow and the days after that. But we are  not going to let these illnesses win. We are going to breathe in and out, one breath at a time, each and everyday knowing that this is our best fight and it’s enough, it will always be enough, because I am enough and you are enough!

Being tired is OK. Being weary is OK, feeling broken and yelling that we have fucked up is OK. But by taking the next breath…..after the yelling session, is all we need to do…..because that’s the process of the healing fight.
If you are resonating with my thoughts, feelings and conversations tonight please let me know, by liking and sharing this blog.

 I write about my experiences with wandering a journey with all the invisible illnesses that are part of me because when we share our stories we connect and help each other.

I am a advocate and speaker who has made it my mission to change the way healing and recovery is seen for all that live with invisible illness.

If you would like to connect further, please do so on my social media platforms;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/Just_1_Goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess

If you are struggling……that’s ok but remember to find the breath…..breathe in and breathe out so the fight continues.

Much love 
TBG πŸ’‹

β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”

Healing – WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!!??

Healing, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!!??

I got your attention, didn’t I! 

But, truly this is a question that I’ve asked myself many times and it’s the question that many people ask me because, when you live with chronic pain, illness and disease, healing is an unanswered question! 

Simply, though healing is the process of becoming sound or healthy again after a period of illness and/or darkness. Healing is a gift and everyone has the right, to receive it. Once you begin to receive this gift that healing is,  you learn that it is a complete and beautiful process. When in the full process, healing allows a flow of energy, that deals with ‘illness and disease’ at its most deepest level and frees you to work in and with yourself most effectively, so that gets you true and profound results.

So stepping into profound healing helps us with the range of conditions, that we are endeavouring to step out of. It is also a process of relaxation, which helps our bodies to heal authentically and very vulnerably at its own pace and in its own way. When we find true and profound healing, we find the cause of all our pain and suffering and that let’s us release so much, pent up emotional, physical and mental damage. 

Healing is about restoring balance in health and life and therefore is about expressing feelings, allowing us the process of being able to fully connect with the ground that we stand in, letting us regain the control that we need at any particular time of life whether we are in crisis or not.

So working out how we commit to healing is the question. If we are experiencing true healing for the first time we may need more time to learn how to relax into the process and enjoy the full benefit. As we step into that healing, we dabble into a variety of philosophies and resources and it is about trusting that process and learning as we go. 

So, whatever, the process is that we take with healing,  it is so important to keep contact with existing doctors especially if we have conditions that require mainstream medical treatment. Healing complements all conditions (mainstream & alternative) and it is about allowing positive benefits into life’s challenges and experiences. 

This thing called healing is gentle and will never do harm when you allow it to do what it needs too, so step in, take a deep breath and let the process take you on its journey. So my question to you now, is ‘have you connected into a healing  process that helps you’? For those that have not found a healing process that works you may be interested in a upcoming challenge that I am launching that helps you begin the healing process. This will be found on my Facebook business page at http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU but I will also be sharing more and more healing tips across on my other social media channels;

http://www.twitter.com/just_1_goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess

Whatever the path is that we walk, we all have the right to receive the gift of healing- so let us make sure we do.

Much love

TBG πŸ’‹

Childhood Adversities Do Cause Chronic Illness…..

I’ve lived with chronic illnesses for more than 15 years…….well actually longer than that. Some of these illnesses were able to be treated adequately, many others untreated because even medical practitioners were not able to best understand how the illnesses were affecting me. This left me feeling let down and more and more alone. I kept walking the journey looking for ways to be healthy but this path is difficult, wiping out all facets of normal living. It was last year after my rheumatologist pushed me over the edge, that I couldn’t take it any more – YES, I attempted suicide! 

That suicide attempt was actually a positive and the first key that gave me the steps to true healing. The circumstances of last year allowed more reviews of my health and it was then that a neurologist sat with me and asked me a very  important question and one that would begin a new journey to better health that I hadn’t known for years perhaps ever. The question was β€œDo you remember any childhood trauma’s or stresses”? Well, my answer was easy – “ fuck yes , excuse my language” 

This specialist went on to explain to me that adversity in childhood can lead to a chronic state of fight and flight which creates levels of toxic inflammation and illness. Researchers have found that when stress hormones flood the  body and brain of a child, they alter the genetic makeup and basically re-set the stress response to β€œhigh” for life. So I was beginning to get answers to why high levels of inflammation manifested into cancers, autoimmune illnesses and neurological disorders like mine. 

This new research is fabulous, because it gives evidence of how a life time of physical, mental and emotional abuse can severely impact adult health. The percentages of people experiencing adverse childhood experiences are high and yes, include the obvious sexual and physical abuse, but even stress with growing up with divorced parents, mentally ill parents and having a parent who belittled you, increases the likelihood of being diagnosed with serious illness as adults. This research is showing that when medical practitioners acknowledge and discuss patients’ childhood traumas openly, their patients find healthcare that significantly reduces a need for doctor visits, because they can heal. The negative is that despite this very important and positive research, linking childhood stress to adult chronic health, the majority of the medical community acts as if these findings don’t exist, making it difficult for patients to validate health issues and find help to heal. Perhaps the bulk of our mainstream medical practitioners fear teaching this new research as it will open the door to bringing psychology into the medical treatment room.

As, one patient that has walked the plank with chronic illnesses for way too long, now learning that a lot of my childhood stresses have been why I became so ill, is also why I now stand up and speak out as a advocate for better healthcare. What is needed is  a global awareness campaign. This global awareness campaign would be to educate  medical practitioners and the general public on just how childhood trauma can cause chronic adult illness. Once this can be achieved, we can truly help those who feel paralysed by their past, so that they can achieve the healthy lives they deserve.

 I know having a medical practitioner that considered my mind and body very important, gave me trust about learning how certain mental and physical health tools could assist causes and symptoms of some of my long term health issues. This gave me such a profound revelation in how my childhood had caused a destructive chronic health downturn, but it also finally helped me to begin to truly heal mentally, physically and emotionally. 

With this research linking childhood adversity to chronic adult illness being used more openly by our medical community, think of how much money we might save in our health care system, if we seriously consider the role that past trauma plays in medical illnesses, instead of waiting a lifetime for it to show up in difficult to treat illnesses and diseases that ruin lives sometimes permanently. More and more, medical research is recognising proven interventions for recovering from trauma, even years after events have occurred so please help me as I build what I want to be the biggest global awareness campaign that is going to change the way we assist chronic illness health treatments around the world.

I would love for you to like and share this post and if you haven’t connected with me, please do so on my social media channels;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/just_1_goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess
Much love

TBG πŸ’‹

Adaptive & Restorative Yoga After Illness, Injury or Paralysis….

Yoga is a practice, NOT a destination particularly when it comes to healing.

In this crazy busy modern day life, the practice of yoga is about joining movement with breath, action with thought and awareness with intention to bring healing and peace to body, mind and spirit, which is  why it is a modality suited to those people wanting to recover from chronic invisible and mental illnesses.

Let me tell you how yoga can make you feel better as you take the journey from chronic pain, suffering and stress. If you have ever wondered if yoga is something you can do, or if it will be too hard It is absolutely for you and it doesn’t have to be hard! Everybody that is seeking to heal are different, they have different pain, tension and energy levels.  Adaptive yoga is a way to raise awareness levels of all the variables that I’ve mentioned. Only you can know how it feels to be in your body. This is something I absolutely know, as it’s been a 15 plus year journey to find a recovery path.


Yoga, within all styles, asks you to “start where you are”.  Adaptive yoga helps you identify where that is, which is why it’s perfect if you are considering yoga to help recovery from illness, injuries or disability. 

I would define ‘adaptive yoga’ by saying that we adapt the instruction and practice of yoga for the body in a safe and comfortable way. This style of yoga is accessible to everyone no matter where their body is in any moment.

I’ve created an adaptative & restorative approach to my yoga practice that has brought benefits to my healing of health and life and it’s why I am now bringing my approach to others. I have lived with many challenges including paralysis and that’s why I know this style and approach to yoga is so beneficial to healing. 


If you would like to know more about my journey and the creation of my “adaptive restorative yoga” please send me a message or perhaps connect with me through my social media channels;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/just_1_goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess

Much love to you 

Namaste 

TBG πŸ’‹

Just Let Go Of That Rope….

Living with chronic illness, feels as like you are holding onto a rope that’s going to give way at any given moment! Everything that you know is connected to that rope and god forbid if you and it were seperated!  So if you were to let go of that rope and you and everything you had ever known suddenly went splat – what would happen! HARSH! Well, yes but I am saying it because that was me! I had been holding on to a rope for fifteen or more years thinking that it was going to save me! The tighter I held onto myself, the harder it was to actually hold on and the worse I was becoming in health in its entirety! I was not myself in any shape or form……

MY ROPE SNAPPED……was I dead, no! I fell, not from grace not in anyone’s eyes except for my own! What happened, when I fell, was the fall that I needed. It awakened me to the fact, that the rope was keeping me stuck in pain and not just physical pain, but emotional, mental and spiritual pain! If you are reading this and you’ve been in this position or perhaps you are in this position, you know that this pain ties you up in knots and creates behaviours that are less than ideal. Holding onto that rope was taking from you, all that you were, all that you are and possibly all that you could be!!!

LET GO OF THAT ROPE! I beg you, SO WHAT IF YOU FALL! Better that you fall flat on your face, than you destroy what you are and what you could be….

When you fall, you seperate yourself from that rope. You give yourself freedom, you give yourself a breath of real air that you haven’t felt for so long! You are now free to wander in search of what you need to heal truly. I ask you, after you’ve read this to take a few moments to write a list of ‘what you are holding onto’ and then respond to each one of your answers with this question, ‘ what would happen if I let it all go’? Be totally honest!

I did this and wow what I was holding onto was fucking BS – they were excuses, they were all excuses held together by fear! Simply, everything that had happened to me years prior had been squeezing me so tightly, that stress had created  a fear ball of me! That fear made me so ill and those illnesses were my rope!

The rope needed to snap, so that I could heal! I couldn’t continue to live that way! Slowly and continuously, I began to heal. I started by being able to sit, then I could stand and walk. My personal next goal  is to scream and shout my way across the globe , telling anyone who wants to listen about my glorious life – because that’s what it is! My life is no longer wrapped in bandaids, it’s now a life open and celebrating the scars being free to be me just as I am!

To each one of you, living with or in mental, physical, emotional and spiritual pain….you don’t need to live like this; PLEASE LET GO and LET YOURSELF FALL. The gentle arms of life will catch you and teach you again to sit, stand, walk and talk about being free to be you!

If you are still afraid to let go….email me at harmonishakti@gmail.com 

If you’ve liked or resonated with this in some way, please like or share and maybe even connect with me on my social media channels;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/Just_1_Goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess
Please remember life is always about hope, healing & chasing life.

Much love 

TBG πŸ’‹

Stepping from illness to healthy my way!

Let me tell you, bringing back an exercise regime after such a long journey with chronic illness is sought with so much fear and anxiety. But, if I want to have the life that is filled with effervescent energy and clean health, I need to be starting again with rebuilding inner & outer health. So, i have got to do this properly and appropriately. I think bringing an exercise regime will help my body to heal faster physically and allow me to feel so much better  mentally, thus continuing to move forward with my dreams for the future.  But, thinking about this new journey, I also know how important it is to know the limitations that I have as it’s been a very long time since I’ve had fitness incorporated into my everyday. By increasing my activity slowly and with fierce patience, I hope I will be going to avoid injury and get back to a optimum state of health and fitness. Also this new regime will be done by working with my many doctors and rehabilitation specialists particularly my OT (occupational therapist) , NeuroPhysio and my yoga mentors. 


To resume and start this fitness regime after so long I need to make specific precautions to ensure that everything will be ok.

So where do I begin in making my plan;

  • First and foremost my steps to increasing physical therapy is by continual consultations with my doctors, therapists and mentors. The best thing i can do, as I start this exercise plan after being sick for so long is to talk continuously with my team of health professionals as a balancing tool of advocacy. 
  • The next point of call and important factors to remember are to recognise symptoms before and after any exercise I do. Knowing when to keep going or when to stop and seek attention is one action that most causes me some anxiety, but I also know that the thoughts are there because I haven’t done this in a long while.

Acknowledging that I am starting over is vital and no matter how healthy I was before becoming sick , this journey has taken a toll on my body. My bones, muscles and joints are all weaker than before and my stamina and endurance is much lower. Reminder to self – this is normal! Keep telling myself that I am starting over, like it’s my first ever time exercising. I think preparing myself mentally to start slow, will allow myself to increase my activity more and more overtime and will ensure my patience stays strong. I can and I will get fit, it is just going to take time.
One major thing I must remember is that my immune system has been compromised from my many complex conditions, so ensuring I can heal and overcome my illnesses in total means I cannot overwork my body. I know when I overwork myself, I feel unwell for at least the next day or maybe more.

In order for me to be successful with this regime, I need to plan ahead with making goals;

  1.  I will make my goals each week and write them down, so I will be more likely to achieve them – accountability is everything!
  2. I will write down my main goal, and then add smaller goals for one week, only, increasing to two weeks and a month as I progress. 
  3. I need to remember to be realistic and specific in my goals. 
  4. After each exercise session I will write down my accomplishments as a marker to see how far I am moving forward.

Most of all I, need to stay motivated by working to my weekly goals and exercise plans. Because this is a new journey in a while, there are going to be challenging times so working with my team will help me find a success.


So let me begin now by listening to my body. From yoga to cardio, if I can only exercise for 30 minutes each time, because I am feeling exhausted, that’s okay! Be proud of what I achieve in that session.  The most important goal for me, is to be always slightly outside of my comfort zone, without being in pain or having symptoms return. I’ve been ill for a long time, so even walking is a challenge, but with the help of my walker I will progress. I am in a position now, where I can begin. So I am starting small, even getting up to check the mailbox or a lap of the clothesline is a session. Then each day I will slowly and gradually increase the cardio and strength activity using the exercises mapped out by my neurophysio and remembering to incorporate mindfulness with yoga and meditation into each day.

I hope, if you are reading this I may have inspired you to think about starting or restarting a fitness regime after a long journey with illness. If you are able to start, believe me you will not regret the decision as despite the challenges it empowers and awakens mind and body and brings a new level of healing. Just, please make sure you have a wonderful team around you. 

Also remember I am on social media, and I would love for you to come and say hi on any of these channels;

http://www.facebook.com/TheBarefootGoddessAU

http://www.twitter.com/Just_1_Goddess

http://www.instagram.com/the__barefoot__goddess
Healing and healthy hugs to you all,

πŸ’‹
“Wandering Towards Wellness, Globally”