A lot of people are asking me – why have you changed your name from “Lisa Raie” to “Harmoni Shakti”?
Well, let me explain;
Changing my name so dramatically isn’t something many do, so it is probably why so many people are asking me why??? I could keep answering the questions as they come, but I thought it would be good and insightful to tell the story of why I changed it, what the process is like and what Ive learned from it.
Why I did I change my name – Well, firstly let me say changing my name is not an easy process and I’ve had to take lots of things into account, still am. But one main reason of why I did it – was my stepping outside of the abuse that I had long endured as a child AND changing the name was the final key that allowed me to step into my truest self, the healing I’ve needed to live the life I love . My old name gave me too many bad memories! That person, that me with the old name continually felt squashed with anxiety and illness. Being called the old name I felt like I was always being spat on or as a lesser woman and I could not truly wander towards healing and wellness as I wanted.
Having these thoughts continually spiking my every breath, became monotonous on physical, emotional and mental health. All I ever tried to do was to fit in at school and life, the last thing I expected was that I had to basically wrestle with my father over how I was expected to be. I was expected to be that “Little Lisa” – seen and not heard!
Of course – living a life like that was intolerable! I wanted to be free, I wanted the best but I didn’t like being told that I was not good enough, or no you can’t do that – that’s not professional enough! As I was releasing the abuse that came from this childhood, I knew I wanted to change my name. I knew I wanted to choose a unique name that almost nobody else in the world had. I also knew that I wanted my name to flow with the spirit of the soul that I was awakening too.
And so with my new name chosen, which I must tell you, I think it is pretty cool, but it’s also fiercely freeing and cathartic as I continue to release the many things that have ever held me back. It has also begun a true continuation of the healing journey back to optimum wellness that I have been attempting for over ten years. All of this, also is in a sense, me being in control of a life after seemingly having no control for many many years!
Going back to the decision, I knew changing my name was also the right thing to do, as I had never been very tied to the name and I think it was because of the abuse that I had endured. As a teenager, was the first occasion I began to outgrow my given name. I don’t place a lot of importance on the still living people from my family, because simply we don’t have anything in common and I don’t want to be abused anymore. I am now me, with a new name with the truthful self now able to stand in the everyday status of the world helping myself but also helping others. I also think, in my case, the ties with my narcissistic father choosing my name was another reason that the change had to be made. I know that most of my family members and friends who now know I’ve changed my name are not upset, although they can’t understand why Ive done it and maybe they never will! I have no contact with my abusive father but I do know, he would think my decision was stupid and probably as a matter of revenge.
So begins the process of changing my name, it legally is very tough. The legal process now, is about the convenience of having my preferred name match my legal name and an exciting new chapter in my life. It has brought up some tough feelings towards particularly my father and how I feel about my childhood. It also brings up memories of a mother now not living , but I know she would of supported this decision. I kind of expected these feelings, that come and go and by formally following the name changing process, I can continue to get some deep issues out in the open as a result of my name change and truly heal physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Choosing my new name is a weird process. Basically, I could choose anything I wanted to, so long as it is deemed appropriate by the Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages. There is a lot of paperwork as I said before to get my name changed legally, and I am still deciding between two name variations: “Harmoni Shakti” and “Harmoni Raie Shakti”. The name has to be accepted as appropriate. I also have to specify a reason for changing it in more detail than simply “personal” or “professional reasons.” This is why I am now using my new name already. I am hoping my reason for change, that it is confusing for my legal name to not match my professional name.
Changing my name has made me think a lot more about the importance of what our names mean to us in every way. I mean, have you ever thought about your name and how you use it throughout your life, how you associate your name with your personality. It really is interesting to ponder, just how much our names affect our lives. For those that see my name change as offensive, especially towards my family or just unnecessary, I hope I have given some insight and clearance but I will not get upset by your thoughts or actions as it is my decision and in the end it’s my life that I am living.
Changing my name has made me feel good in terms of bucking the status quo and questioning things that I have taken for granted for years and years and the confidence it has also given me, is beyond clear that this is the right decision. Here is the thing, that I’ve noticed since changing my name, when I’m having a bad day and I look in the mirror, the first thing that pops into my head is my birth name. I don’t know why – BUT then I will repeat to my reflection; “Good Bye old soul – I’m the new, improved me with the new, improved name – stand proud and shine.” Do you know what happens, I shine. Those bad days are becoming less and less as my confidence and the healing process becomes more dominant. My old self with the old name was never in control. But being the new woman with the new name, i can be my fiercely independent self that I’ve always wanted and thus healing and important life decisions can be made lived and loved.
So moving on with a life to love, I feel like my new name represents me better as who I am now. I am Harmoni, the barefoot goddess shining a light using yoga and meditation to raise awareness and guidance for healing and loving life.
Harmoni (AKA The Barefoot Goddess) 💋
Please connect with me on my social media channels;
“Wandering Towards Wellness, Globally “